Nightmares of the Past.

Backgarden of a dream" , by Erik Pevernagie, oil on canvas, 88 x 66 cm

https://commons.wikimedia.org/wiki/User:Onlysilence

"They" say that if a person has bottled up all kinds of pain in their hearts and never dealt with it that person will have a crisis when they are in their forties. That happened to me. I started having terrible nightmares. Nightmares that took me back to my childhood when my father had abused me physically and sexually.

I started going to therapy, and the nightmares helped me understand what was going on in my mind. I would write them down and share them with my therapist. But there was a big problem along with the nightmares and that was my attitude towards them. Instead of seeing them as a tool to help me, I saw them as a form of torture. I would wake up screaming or crying. I would feel depressed all day after having one. I would be afraid to go to bed at night. I got angry at God.

Recently, after being all done dealing with my father, some new nightmares came visiting. They were about another member of my family. I was in therapy at the time and my therapist had asked me, "Do you think you have really forgiven your father?" I said I did think so. But, I told her there was one family member I may not have forgiven.

I told her that when I knew this person was coming over I would feel upset. My thoughts were not always kind towards them. I said, "I think I need to talk this over with God. I thought I had forgiven this person."

Then the dreams started. No, I had not forgiven. One dream was so terrible I was beside myself when I woke up. I said to God, "Why do I have to go through this?" So, I started praying each day about it and suddenly one day this person didn't bother me any more! I loved having them over to my house.

I don't understand why I can't just be magically healed of the past, like making the blind see. Why can't it be that easy when your mind is broken?  I guess it just can't. I finally feel thankful for all the awful dreams because they have pushed me along the road to healing. God knows what he is doing; and even if something is painful for awhile, he will use it to bring true healing.

I know war veterans have nightmares, and I am so sorry for that. I hope they will go to a therapist about it because I doubt I would have gotten better without someone to talk to about my nightmares, pain and feelings. "They" say dreams are about things in our lives we have never resolved that need resolving.
Now, when I see my father in my dreams he does not harm me. He makes a sort of 'cameo' appearance. Lol  "Oh yeah, there's Dad. Why is he here? I thought he was dead." He doesn't scare me any more. Maybe, now that I have truly forgiven the other person in the family, maybe I am done. Maybe I am actually free of the past.

God's Work in North Africa.

Men of Algeria, 1987

"It will come about after this That I will pour out My Spirit on all mankind; And your sons and daughters will prophesy, Your old men will dream dreams, Your young men will see visions." Joel 2:28

“‘And in the last days it shall be, God declares, that I will pour out my Spirit on all flesh, and your sons and your daughters shall prophesy, and your young men shall see visions, and your old men shall dream dreams."  Acts 2:17

I read that there was a wonderful movement of God in Algeria, so I went online to see if it were true. Yes, Praise God, it is true! Muslims are having dreams and visions of Jesus and angels. How wonderful, how good is our heavenly Father!  Here is an address to go to to read about it.

http://www.cbn.com/cbnnews/world/2014/April/Revival-in-Land-Once-Hostile-to-Christ/

"...a profound move of God in the predominantly Muslim nations of Mauritania, Western Sahara, Morocco, Algeria, Libya and Tunisia.

From the shores of Casablanca, Morocco, to Tripoli, Libya, experts say the growth of Christianity, especially in the last 20 years, has been unprecedented.

Now that growth is also evident in the North African nation of Algeria."

God is pouring out the Holy Spirit in abundance. Praise the Lord! It is wonderful to be in the last days of earth's history and see how God works to bring thousands of people to himself. May the whole world be lightened with his glory.

"Therefore be patient, brethren, until the coming of the Lord. The farmer waits for the precious produce of the soil, being patient about it, until it gets the early and late rains."  James 5:7

“Be glad, O children of Zion, and rejoice in the LORD your God, for he has given the early rain for your vindication; he has poured down for you abundant rain, the early and the latter rain, as before."  Joel 2:23

A Dream.

I once had a dream that I believe was sent from God.

I was at church when I saw my father. He had abused me as a child. He came up to me and yelled something. I said, "You cannot hurt me any more because the angels are with me." As I said this I saw many angels surrounding me. I left the church with the angels and we walked until we came to some green grass. We began to sing a beautiful song and I saw on a hill in front of us three plain crosses. As we sang the middle cross became covered with roses. We stopped singing and I saw Jesus come up over the hill towards me. I ran to him and he hugged me and I felt completely happy.

I was going to write something else tonight, but this morning God brought this dream to mind. Then I couldn't get on my bible verse page just now and the dream came to mind again.  I'm not sure why God might want me to share this dream, but I will.