A Broken Heart: A Curse or a Blessing?

I've been reading, "Life of the Beloved," by Henri J.M. Nouwen. He says everyone on earth has a broken heart. I believe this to be true. We all get a broken heart from people who are unkind to us, suffering through a war, going through an illness or many other negative things. No one's life is perfect although some suffer more than others. Each of our sufferings is unique to us. No one knows exactly what we feel and go through.

Nouwen says many people look upon their brokenness as a curse when it is actually a blessing. I had to read that chapter twice because although I have read the same thing in other books it is extremely hard for me to grasp. How on earth can pain, whether mental or physical be put under the heading of "blessing"?

So I re-read the chapter underlining words so I could make some sense of it and I came to this conclusion

1. If we look on suffering as a curse it deepens our feeling of worthlessness.

2. If we put suffering under the heading of blessings then it becomes a challenge to see it as a purification, pruning and a deeper communion with God.

3. It can lead to a total surrender to God along with deeper communion.

When I was reading this, I looked up on my wall and noticed the picture my sister gave me of Jesus on the cross. Jesus said about his suffering, "I tell you the truth, you will weep and lament, but the world will rejoice; you will grieve, but your grief will be turned to joy." John 16:20 while the Old Testament says it is a curse, "Anyone who is hung on a tree is under God's curse." Deuteronomy 21:23 But of course the curse came to be a blessing.

I remembered reading once of Solzhenitsyn, who changed after he was thrown in prison. Prison became a blessing to him.

“Bless you, prison!” by Aleksandr I. Solzhenitsyn

“It was granted to me to carry away from my prison years on my bent back, which nearly broke beneath its load, this essential experience: how a human being becomes evil and how good. In the intoxication of youthful successes I had felt myself to be infallible, and I was therefore cruel. In the surfeit of power I was a murderer and an oppressor.

In my most evil moments I was convinced that I was doing good, and I was well supplied with systematic arguments. It was only when I lay there on rotting prison straw that I sensed within myself the first stirrings of good. Gradually it was disclosed to me that the line separating good and evil passes not through states, nor between classes, nor between political parties either—but right through every human heart—and through all human hearts…

That is why I turn back to the years of my imprisonment and say, sometimes to the astonishment of those about me: ‘Bless you, prison!’ I…have served enough time there. I nourished my soul there, and I say without hesitation: ‘Bless you, prison, for having been in my life!’”

–Aleksandr I. Solzhenitsyn, The Gulag Archipelago: 1918-1956, Vol. 2 (New York: Harper & Row, 1973), 615-17.

So, now I understand a bit more of how our suffering can help us get closer to God.